A first conversation is awkward. To some, courting someone new is like getting a root canal. Aiming to level the playing field for socially awkward people, Tinder was supposed to help. Has it? Hell, no.
It has instead become what some like to call a ‘meat market,’ giving people the option to unmatch or stop talking if the conversation isn’t stimulating. Tinder inboxes are filled with responses ranging from droll eye-rolling to appalled unmatching. Here are some things you may want to remember if you’ve ever bombed while texting someone:
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Open With A Question
You can make initiating a conversation less intimidating by thinking of fun and interesting questions. Diaz Dating Group matchmaker Jasmine Diaz recommends open-ended questions instead of yes-or-no questions.
Consider topics related to your interests: Where do you like to travel? What’s on your Spotify playlist? What’s your most adventurous experience?” According to Diaz, don’t bring up touchy subjects such as politics or religion immediately.
Pull Inspiration From Their Profile
A quick scroll through their profile provides insight into interests you may share. Diaz suggested saying something that cracked you up in their profile. Diaz suggests referencing that cool hiking photo or funny prompt that made you swipe right in the first place.
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Saying, “I’ve always wanted to visit Mexico City!” if they posted a photo. Ask their recommendations or ask about their favorite character or episode if “Curb Your Enthusiasm” is their favorite show.
Play ‘This Or That’
According to OkCupid dating coach Damona Hoffman, host of the “Dates and Mates” podcast, a simple “this or that” question often gets a response. You can start an interesting conversation about anything, whether you agree or not, whether you like chocolate chips or Oreos, beer or wine, cats or dogs, East Coast or West Coast rap.