Life

What It Is Like To Be Owned By A Dachshund—As Imparted By Actual Companions

Okay, let’s just call it like it is—you do not own your Dachshund, your Dachshund owns you.  Anyone who has ever lived with a Dachshund can pretty much validate this statement in a heartbeat.  So much so that they would even go so far as to state that when you bring a Dachshund into your home, from that moment on your home is no longer yours.

The Dachshund breed, known by many as sausage dogs, may be small, but what they lack in stature is more than up for in bossiness.  With that said, here a few truths that anyone owned by a Dachshund knows as truth.

Selective Hearing

This fact is never more true than when referring to a Dachshund.  You tell them to come—they run away.  You ask them to sit—they think nah, I would rather lie down.  However, if they hear a package open or a cheese wrapper crinkle, you can almost be assured they will be there quick as lightning to investigate.

Image: Dachshunds Unlimited

Yappy Little Scamps

If your home is a mecca of peace and tranquility, you can bet that when a Dachshund takes up residence your quiet, peaceful home will pretty much go out the window.  Dachshunds are barkers, and will pretty much bark at anything and everything.   They are even known to bark at the blowing wind if the mood strikes them.

Eye Masters

Dachshunds have two eyes, and they are masters at using them to either get what they want or to get their point across.  In most cases, if they are not giving you the mastered sly side eye look, then they are hitting you with their manipulative puppy dog eyes that no one can resist.

Image: You Did What With Your Weiner

Big Dog—Little Package

Most Dachshunds come entirely equipped with the mentality that they are a much bigger, meaner, feared breed than what they actually are.  In their word, they are big mean Rottweilers, that is more than able to take on anyone or anything they meet.  What is really weird is that they will stand up to any other dog, bigger than themselves, but when they meet a dog their own size, that is when the cowering and fear kicks in.